Living To Carry The Cross, Learning To Live The Hard Eucharisteo

I t came like a bomb exploding right into her face. Words that would set her reeling. A tone that she would imprint on her heart forever. All sorts of moments afterward questioning "What had she done so wrong?" "What had she said so wrong?" She had traveled to visit with him and all seemed the same. She had many chances to ask the questions that she was naturally curious about. Things like " How long have you been dating?", "What is she like?", "Where did you meet her?". Never knowing that all the while with each question her Father felt as if he was under some kind of federal investigation. Sunday had come and her family packed up all their belongings to travel the long road home. She would receive more news in the day ahead. They had set their wedding date. It was a more serious relationship than what she had been led to believe. There was so much secrecy surrounding this whole relationship. I guess her curiosity got the best of her....

T he call came on a Friday. I had to brace myself hard against it. It blew right through every joint in my body leaving me feeling stunned and knocked to me feet. He is lonely and feels like he needs the companionship of another lady. I had to find this news out from my sister. I thought He would eventually take this step maybe 4-5 years down the road. But not a year and 2 months after  her passing.  "I'm not ready for this I told her". It was my sister's birthday and it was not the kind of news you deliver to someone on their birthday. I began the waiting game. Waiting to see if he would call to tell me. The waiting brought nothing. Several days finally passed between this conversation and still time brought nothing. As if time were standing still on my end waiting to see if could gather up what he needed to let me in on his news. Finally, we had decided to go home and visit. We were able to catch a break in the  weather and all was quiet in the next few days....

I t might look like and even sound like the strangest word that you have heard. He had said it from the pulpit and it has stuck with me since then. I can feel it taking place deep within. Something new, something fresh, something that is holy and only explained through the power of His Spirit. I still myself and slow in Him in the quiet of the morning.   Reflecting back on Christmas and  turning our Christmas upside down this year.   to go further into relationship with Him who saves completely. We traveled along with Mary to Bethlehem to see Him born. Looking in to a new year with Christ guiding the way. I want to draw myself tight folding into Him so I can hear completely what He wants to do through me.   I lean into His beautiful grace and keep counting His gifts. Looking for each one daily in the messy, the mundane, the hard, the beautiful moments of life. I look forward to unfurling my wings into Him.     and catching my flig...

  Eucharisteo. I type it big and proclaim it everywhere. I proclaim it in the warmth of my home in many ways.                                                                                          It is a word I will never forget. It is the only way to Live and Breathe . This slowing to Give thanks to HIM who grows our faith in the GOOD , the BAD , the MESSY, and the right down gritty parts of daily life.                                      This slowing to Live thanks to Him who was and is and is to come. The one in whom we have our being. I keep it close by, my gratitude journal.  Where I meet with Jesus to live out this Eucha...

T he week is drawing to a close. I'm worn out. I have with His strength been able to carry on. He has given me an extra measure of strength that I can really supernaturally feel. My thoughts had been reeling deep within of all of you who do this longer than I have had to. You walk this journey 24/7 and the only way to get through it really is on your knees. My heart swelled with pain as I thought of you and compassion for you has overtaken me. Please forgive me for all the times that I have taken for granted my husband. I want to apologize to you today single Mom. I'm sorry for all the times you have gone to the grocery store and had to carry your groceries into the house by yourself with your infant on your hip.                                               ...

T he storm looms big. Waiting to take him over. His mother has passed away. With her death comes an unexpected cost that overwhelms the soul and threatens to break him into. He's worried and full of anxiety. He's wondering how this bill will be paid. I Talk on the phone with our benevolence  ministry at church. They have said they will pay $500.oo towards the bill. They took up a collection at his job while he was away for the funeral. They wanted to help pay towards the funeral. They collected $140.00. God is faithful I tell him. He's walking towards a pit and has climbed down in. He's hanging on the side with white knuckled hands grasping to loosened dirt. I tell him he has to fight for joy . One can only win this type of battle when you fight for joy. He says he's too tired to fight. I tell him to fight on his knees. Keep his own gratitude journal. It's the only way to stay out of the pit really. By learning to give thanks in all circumstances and to live ...

I t has been a year since we said " We would see you later"  So much has happened since you left this place and took your flight home.                                              Good and perfect gift has grown so much and has often mentioned how he misses you. Our joy girl has grown to and is doing so many new things daily. You will just love her Mom! Her sweet baby smiles and sounds bring an added measure of  happiness to our days. We had her dedicated at church back in June. Dad is doing well. He actually flew for the first time! Do you believe that Mom! He said he would never fly. He talks often of you and has said along with me how much he would have loved if you would have been here to see our little joy girl.    ...