Living To Carry The Cross, Learning To Live The Hard Eucharisteo

Y ou have been wheeled down the hallway, down to the lobby of the hospital, where the car awaits you to put the new gift that God has given to you in the car seat. You were kind and gracious to the nurses who came in at all hours to check your vitals and made sure that you seemed to be healing up just fine. The new babe in the car seat, with you seated by it now yawns and closes the tiny little eyes to dream more dreams and the car drives away to carry you home to start this new journey of Motherhood.                                               You arrive home and ease your still swollen body out of the car. The new member has been brought into the house. You bend over the car seat with that glowing smile that you think will never leave your face and u...

I guess at some point it becomes this way. It doesn't happen over night. Although your emotions lie to you and say it does. No, it takes time to spiral down. Spending less and less time with one another. The kids always coming in place of the other. No date nights to rekindle the flames that was once there. Your hormones have changed so much since having the kids that it doesn't matter to you really.You just go to bed without even a good night kiss and rollover without having another thought because you are so exhausted from raising your children and being present in just about everything that happened during their day. You look at other couples you know and don't dare  ask the brave question. "Is this how it is for you too?" Would they even be brave back and tell you?  You begin to feel all alone. Wanting to tell someone about how hard things are. Someone you could confide in. Someone who would pray hard for you. For you the "Big D" is not an opt...

S he had talked about it being the theme for her life this year. She has experienced small ones as well as big ones. Who knew that this year would be the year that she would experience the final victory... of running the race well... and making it to the finish line. She had been diagnosed a year ago with lung cancer. She had never smoked a day in her life but then again cancer is no respecter of person's nor  their lungs for that matter. She had a wonderful ministry. She humbly admitted when she had fallen short. It's what made her such a woman of the word. She knew from which her help came from. There would be no more high school graduations that she would attend. No more college graduations. No weddings. She would never get to feel the ache of wanting to hold that long awaited for Grandbaby. He would never sleep beside her again. He would never bring her that first cup of morning coffee. No good morning kiss. His devotional time would be spent with the Father by ...

I t came like a bomb exploding right into her face. Words that would set her reeling. A tone that she would imprint on her heart forever. All sorts of moments afterward questioning "What had she done so wrong?" "What had she said so wrong?" She had traveled to visit with him and all seemed the same. She had many chances to ask the questions that she was naturally curious about. Things like " How long have you been dating?", "What is she like?", "Where did you meet her?". Never knowing that all the while with each question her Father felt as if he was under some kind of federal investigation. Sunday had come and her family packed up all their belongings to travel the long road home. She would receive more news in the day ahead. They had set their wedding date. It was a more serious relationship than what she had been led to believe. There was so much secrecy surrounding this whole relationship. I guess her curiosity got the best of her....

T he call came on a Friday. I had to brace myself hard against it. It blew right through every joint in my body leaving me feeling stunned and knocked to me feet. He is lonely and feels like he needs the companionship of another lady. I had to find this news out from my sister. I thought He would eventually take this step maybe 4-5 years down the road. But not a year and 2 months after  her passing.  "I'm not ready for this I told her". It was my sister's birthday and it was not the kind of news you deliver to someone on their birthday. I began the waiting game. Waiting to see if he would call to tell me. The waiting brought nothing. Several days finally passed between this conversation and still time brought nothing. As if time were standing still on my end waiting to see if could gather up what he needed to let me in on his news. Finally, we had decided to go home and visit. We were able to catch a break in the  weather and all was quiet in the next few days....

I t might look like and even sound like the strangest word that you have heard. He had said it from the pulpit and it has stuck with me since then. I can feel it taking place deep within. Something new, something fresh, something that is holy and only explained through the power of His Spirit. I still myself and slow in Him in the quiet of the morning.   Reflecting back on Christmas and  turning our Christmas upside down this year.   to go further into relationship with Him who saves completely. We traveled along with Mary to Bethlehem to see Him born. Looking in to a new year with Christ guiding the way. I want to draw myself tight folding into Him so I can hear completely what He wants to do through me.   I lean into His beautiful grace and keep counting His gifts. Looking for each one daily in the messy, the mundane, the hard, the beautiful moments of life. I look forward to unfurling my wings into Him.     and catching my flig...

  Eucharisteo. I type it big and proclaim it everywhere. I proclaim it in the warmth of my home in many ways.                                                                                          It is a word I will never forget. It is the only way to Live and Breathe . This slowing to Give thanks to HIM who grows our faith in the GOOD , the BAD , the MESSY, and the right down gritty parts of daily life.                                      This slowing to Live thanks to Him who was and is and is to come. The one in whom we have our being. I keep it close by, my gratitude journal.  Where I meet with Jesus to live out this Eucha...